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Worst Blind Date Ever!!

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I’ve never been one to like being set up on a date, but I have done it a couple of times just to appease some friends.

The first time ended in heartbreak and the second one almost ended in disaster. While I won’t go into the first one, the second one is the stuff movies are made of. I keep telling y’all that I could be in a rom-com easy.

A friend decided this guy would be a great date for me. I worked a lot and I hadn’t been out in a while, so she thought it was about time. I wasn’t game, but finally gave her permission to give the guy my messenger name. He hit me up and we talked for a while online before I felt like he wasn’t a total loon and gave him my phone number, which would later prove to be a huge mistake.

After talking for a while, I agreed to go out on a date with this guy. I got all dolled up.

Cute pencil skirt – check
Cute top – check
Cute heels – check
Face beat to the GAWDS – YASSS Honey!!!

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I decide to drive and meet my date at the restaurant because after all I still don’t know this guy well enough to let him come by my house. I arrive at the restaurant and he greets me at the door…wearing a sweat suit. Clearly I missed the memo that we were dressing down for the occasion.

We are seated and the guy proceeds to tell me he won’t be eating because his momma made his favorite dish…fried chicken.

So if you’re like me you’re thinking that this guy is just not that into me and wants out of the date.

…Keep reading.

I decide since he won’t be eating I will follow suit and order light. I order the Fried Chicken Tender salad and he decides on the House salad. That’s when things take a turn for the worse.

As we make small talk his salad comes and he wolfs it down. All of a sudden he makes this horrendous face at something over my shoulder. I turn around to see two women quickly look away. I ask my date what is wrong and he says “don’t they see me on a date?” He is truly pissed as he continues to angrily eyeball the women.

Weirded out, I keep it moving. My salad arrives and I began to eat while listening to him make wild exclamations about something or other, when he does the unthinkable. He puts his hand in my salad and picks out a piece of chicken. When I say I was out done, I was done.

As he feasts on the chicken from my plate the waitress comes over to see if everything is to our liking. Seeing my date eat from my salad, she playfully smacks his hand and tells him to order his own, she then smiles and walks away. My date looks at me and asks “have you ever seen a white girl fly across the room and through a window?”

Horrified and in disbelief, I push away my salad and try to figure out a way to end this fiasco of a date. He looks at me and asks if I’m finished and note that I didn’t eat all my food, while muttering something about not wasting it. I say that I am as he picks the few remaining pieces of chicken out of my half eaten salad.

I look at my watch and tell him that I need to get back home to my son to help him with a project, which wasn’t a total lie. He pays the bill and walks me out to my car.

Get this, he has the nerve to ask when he can see me again. To say I was flabbergasted is an understatement.

I stop at my car and say I’m not sure, and that I’m really busy these days. He says okay “I’ll call you” and then leans in for a kiss. I put my hand in his chest to block that action and tell him that I don’t kiss on the first date.

Clicking my remote to unlock my door, I get in and say my goodbyes.

Later this guy blew my phone up calling several times for weeks leaving messages and texting. I deemed him crazy as a road lizard and put him on the DNA (DO NOT ANSWER) list.

I never saw him again and the friend that set me up is no longer a friend (for other reasons). While this was several years ago, it would take a hell of a lot to get me to EVER go on another blind date.


Have you ever been on a blind date that went south? Let me know in the comments.

 

2 Comments

  1. Ashley Northington

    March 5, 2015 at 2:33 pm

    That’s pretty bad. But I would say you got out easy! I’ve had some doosies in my day — including listening to a guy go on and on about how ‘big boys’ eat at – get this, OUTBACK STEAKHOUSE – only for my date to order chicken fingers. He couldn’t even afford the meal, he disappeared into the bathroom before the check came and I had to pay!!! Another guy took me to the movies and weirdly kept kissing my hand. I was so shocked and stunned, all I could do was blink in disbelief. Smh. Awful.

    • Pam Williams

      March 6, 2015 at 2:18 pm

      Ashley, You have me giggling!! I don’t think I could deal with that kissing my hand stuff. That would weird me out and my reflexes would have kicked in.

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